My Last Dress
Published 2015
The Sun
THROUGHOUT MY CHILDHOOD I was forced to wear frilly, flouncy, feminine clothes. Every holiday, birthday party, bar mitzvah, wedding, or funeral warranted my wearing what I felt most betrayed my spirit: a dress. I preferred pants, especially the khakis my brother outgrew, which I was allowed to change into after school. Boys’ pants had more pockets. Boys’ blazers, too. My brother’s blazers had deep interior spaces seemingly designed to hold my baseball cards, my gum, and my Swiss Army knife. My stupid girls’ blazers looked like his on the outside, but when I reached within, there was no place to put anything.
I bought my last dress for my brother’s wedding (shortly after realizing I was queer, but just before I shared that news with my family). Imagining the evening my final drag performance, I danced, posed for pictures, and afterward flew home with the dress and hung it in my closet. Five years later, when Beatrice — the beautiful woman I’m now married to — didn’t have anything to wear to a benefit, she borrowed it. She looked amazing that night, wearing the last dress I ever wore.
About
Awards
Columbia Journal: First Place Winner, 2020 Nonfiction Award for autobiographical essay “HYBRID”
Beyond Words Literary Magazine: Winner, 2020 Dream Challenge “Kaden has Covid”
The Maine Review: Hon. Mention, 2021 Embody Award for essay “HIDEOUS”
Sunspot Lit: Finalist, 2020 Inception Contest Flash Fiction “Before and After”
Streetlight Magazine: Hon. Mention, 2020 Essay Contest “Finding Barbie’s Shoes”
Gival Press: Finalist, Oscar Wilde Award 2021 for poem “Self-Portrait at Age 9 as Albert Cashier”
Craft Literary: Hon. Mention, 2021 Flash Fiction Award
North American Review: Finalist, 2020 Kurt Vonnegut Prize
Get in Touch
Recent Work
The Name Dropper – The Maine Review
Small-Town Nonsense – The East Hampton Star
A Conversation with Morgan Talty – The Rumpus
My Avatar (aka afab perpetrates heteronormative relationship) – Holy Gossip
What Goes Around – EAST Magazine
My Earliest Self is a Boy… – Electric Lit
The Liar – The Normal School
I Drew a House – The Rumpus
T – The Rumpus
Time Will Tell – The Fiddlehead (Excerpted from Winter 2023 Print Journal)
Denny and Me – Passengers Journal
More
HYBRID – Columbia Journal
Parallel Family – Harvard Review
Finding Barbie’s Shoes – Streetlight Magazine
Deformed – RFD Magazine
#2486 – The Southampton Review
On Drinking – Stonecoast Review
My Last Dress – The Sun Magazine
Blended Family – The Southampton Review
There are No Baked Potato Chips in Palm Beach – Dash Literary Journal
Last Night I Dreamed My Mother Was Carl Reiner and I Was Sad She Died – Bangalore Review
Reviews and Interviews
A Conversation with Morgan Talty – The Rumpus
Naming Stars: An Interview with Andrés N. Ordorica – The Massachusetts Review
Interview by J Brooke of Hotel Cuba’s author Aaron Hamburger – Streetlight Magazine
J Brooke’s Reading Recommendations – The Fiddlehead
Two New Series Bravely Lose The Labels – Incluvie Film Review
Review of Melissa Febos’ Girlhood – Glint Journal
Review of Susan Conley’s Landslide – Streetlight Magazine
Interview with Massachusetts Review
Interview with Stonecoast Review
My Last Dress
Published 2015
The Sun
THROUGHOUT MY CHILDHOOD I was forced to wear frilly, flouncy, feminine clothes. Every holiday, birthday party, bar mitzvah, wedding, or funeral warranted my wearing what I felt most betrayed my spirit: a dress. I preferred pants, especially the khakis my brother outgrew, which I was allowed to change into after school. Boys’ pants had more pockets. Boys’ blazers, too. My brother’s blazers had deep interior spaces seemingly designed to hold my baseball cards, my gum, and my Swiss Army knife. My stupid girls’ blazers looked like his on the outside, but when I reached within, there was no place to put anything.
I bought my last dress for my brother’s wedding (shortly after realizing I was queer, but just before I shared that news with my family). Imagining the evening my final drag performance, I danced, posed for pictures, and afterward flew home with the dress and hung it in my closet. Five years later, when Beatrice — the beautiful woman I’m now married to — didn’t have anything to wear to a benefit, she borrowed it. She looked amazing that night, wearing the last dress I ever wore.
Recent Work
The Name Dropper – The Maine Review
Small-Town Nonsense – The East Hampton Star
A Conversation with Morgan Talty – The Rumpus
My Avatar (aka afab perpetrates heteronormative relationship) – Holy Gossip
What Goes Around – EAST Magazine
My Earliest Self is a Boy… – Electric Lit
The Liar – The Normal School
I Drew a House – The Rumpus
T – The Rumpus
Time Will Tell – The Fiddlehead (Excerpted from Winter 2023 Print Journal)
Denny and Me – Passengers Journal
More
HYBRID – Columbia Journal
Parallel Family – Harvard Review
Finding Barbie’s Shoes – Streetlight Magazine
Deformed – RFD Magazine
#2486 – The Southampton Review
On Drinking – Stonecoast Review
My Last Dress – The Sun Magazine
Blended Family – The Southampton Review
There are No Baked Potato Chips in Palm Beach – Dash Literary Journal
Last Night I Dreamed My Mother Was Carl Reiner and I Was Sad She Died – Bangalore Review
Reviews and Interviews
A Conversation with Morgan Talty – The Rumpus
Naming Stars: An Interview with Andrés N. Ordorica – The Massachusetts Review
Interview by J Brooke of Hotel Cuba’s author Aaron Hamburger – Streetlight Magazine
J Brooke’s Reading Recommendations – The Fiddlehead
Two New Series Bravely Lose The Labels – Incluvie Film Review
Review of Melissa Febos’ Girlhood – Glint Journal
Review of Susan Conley’s Landslide – Streetlight Magazine
Interview with Massachusetts Review
Interview with Stonecoast Review
About
Awards
Columbia Journal: First Place Winner, 2020 Nonfiction Award for autobiographical essay “HYBRID”
Beyond Words Literary Magazine: Winner, 2020 Dream Challenge “Kaden has Covid”
The Maine Review: Hon. Mention, 2021 Embody Award for essay “HIDEOUS”
Sunspot Lit: Finalist, 2020 Inception Contest Flash Fiction “Before and After”
Streetlight Magazine: Hon. Mention, 2020 Essay Contest “Finding Barbie’s Shoes”
Gival Press: Finalist, Oscar Wilde Award 2021 for poem “Self-Portrait at Age 9 as Albert Cashier”
Craft Literary: Hon. Mention, 2021 Flash Fiction Award
North American Review: Finalist, 2020 Kurt Vonnegut Prize